art. music. insight.

I recently had the opportunity to hear an art therapist tell stories about her education, career and clients. She shared pieces from folks she has worked with that either left an impression on the client or on her or on both and it was clear that these simple drawings, illustrations and collages had opened a door to a deeper connection, one that probably would not have been possible with words alone. My classmates and I were invited to participate in this phenomena by simply drawing what our "weather" looked like that day using markers and a blank sheet of paper. Without really even thinking I took to the task and found that it was not hard to translate my emotions into colors and shapes. Before I knew it I had illustrated a story that summed up my entire week, my emotional landscape and my physical health. And the really sneaky part? When asked to interpret my drawing to others I readily divulged a bunch of personal information that I probably would not have considered sharing with anyone otherwise. It really snuck up on me, but it was actually totally natural and I was left in awe at the power of this simple idea.

Later, the connection between art therapy and music was made clear to me. I suddenly understood that I connect to music in much the same way folks connect to the art they create from their feelings. What "moves" me about certain songs or artists is how they somehow represent the things I'm feeling, the mood I'm in, the thoughts I've had or the things I've done. Sometimes this happens in the lyrics. Other times it's hidden in the music itself, somehow intertwined with the instrumentation. This realization has caused me to be more thoughtful in my approach to music and it has made me more intentional in my listening, something I wasn't sure was possible. I've started choosing one song each day as a sort of theme, something that both summarizes where I am emotionally at the time and also appeals to my ears that day. I've found that some songs are sticking with me across several days, in some cases weeks. I carry them with me for a while until the time when I've moved on, of sorts. Then I find a new song. I thought maybe I'd share some of the music that has been a theme for me in one way or another recently. I'll refrain of explaining all the reasons why, mostly because that feels too intimate, but also because a lot of times I don't ask myself to find all the answers. Sometimes I don't know, and that's okay.

Arcade Fire - "We Used to Wait" from the The Suburbs (2010)

I guess I feel like I've done a lot of waiting recently. I think I'm understanding that in some way, the waiting never stops. There is always something to wait for and in many ways, the anticipation is what keeps me going.

J. Tillman - "Year in the Kingdom" from Year in the Kingdom (2009)

This one came up on shuffle last week and I was reminded of how Josh's music finds a way to cut to the core of me. There is a certain kind of melancholy in his voice. It's sad and sweet at the same time.

The Radio Dept. - "A Token of Gratitude" from Clinging to a Scheme (2010)

It's definitely the music I connect to on this one. I think it's mostly the pulsing fog horn sound. I can't really explain it. It's one of the mysteries I've accepted.

Twin Shadow - "I Can't Wait" from Forget (2010)

If "We Used to Wait" is the positive side of waiting, I suppose this is the negative. Waiting is hard and I wish it was over. I like the sleepy dance party feel. Can. We. Please. Gohomealready.

best of the '00s, pt. 8

In response to a Paste magazine article, I've been listing what I feel to be the best 50 albums of the past decade, in no particular order. That being said, I will admit that I have saved some of my personal favorites for the next three entries. To refresh your memory, here are the criteria. We're looking at artists who have "shaped your decade" with their influence, originality and all around goodness. And it's my blog so, some things made the list just because I said so. Here are 15 through 11.




15. The National - Boxer (2007)

It took me a little while to warm up to lead singer Matt Berninger's voice. His baritone is a bit unusual for a "rock" band, with it's deep mumbling. In the end I think the distinct sound of his voice is one of the band's many strength's though. Nothing else would do on songs like "Brainy" where Berninger professes his obsession and near stalker sentimentality for the object of his affection. In other places his voice perfectly conveys the cynicism and sarcasm of some of the lyrics ("Mistaken For Strangers" and "Squalor Victoria").

There is something unique about their writing. Most of the music has a dark feel to it. It's not quite depressing and it's not ominous or brooding but it's honest, and at times, heavy with reality. And there is something different about the lyrics. Perhaps it's Berninger's delivery, but his vocabulary and the imagery in his words make it clear that this band has a different perspective than the rest of us.

This is one that I do not get sick of. It's a regular listen.




14. Iron & Wine - Our Endless Numbered Days (2004)

Sam Beam's music holds the comfort of childhood lullabies. His soft whisper soothes the restless mind and his lite instrumentation rocks the weary head into a quiet stillness. The cover art is fitting. This album in particular sparks an emotional reaction for me. Beam's voice and his melodies feel nostalgic. As I listen I feel a longing for things past. I would like to be lying in a field, watching the sky. I'd like to be on the beach, listening to the waves roll in. I'd like to be in a lawn chair at my cousin's farm, listening to the bull frogs croak, watching the wind pass through the trees. This is one those albums that makes you feel joy and sadness at the same time. "Naked As We Came" is a great example. He sings about a deep love, one that acknowledges death and finds comfort in passing in the presence of that love. There is great joy in love like that and great sadness, knowing that we will eventually be separated from it. Beam captures these emotions so well, whether it's in his lyrics or the music itself.




13. Bloc Party - Silent Alarm (2005)

I love "Like Eating Glass." The drums sound fantastic. The guitars are racing. I like to test the limitations of my speakers and my ear drums when listening. What makes this record great is that the energy from that first track is carried throughout. There is something about lead singer Kele Okereke's half singing-half talking that is a perfect fit for that energy. It suits the end of "Like Eating Glass" and the verses on "Positive Tension" just right, giving the band a taste of punk. Perhaps I'm just partial to the British accent though. Regardless, Okereke and mates crafted quite a nice collection of reckless, throbbing songs about youth, young love and young politics.

I'd like to know what happened to this band. Silent Alarm was such an onslaught of various styles and sounds, but the two albums that followed were no where near as varied and interesting. In fact, they're quite boring.




12. Arcade Fire - Funeral (2004)

Another band with a big sound. As with Boxer, it took several listens for me to appreciate this one. I'm not sure what my problem was. This is an album of near epic proportions. Just listen to the way "Wake Up" soars, and remember how perfect it was for the Where the Wild Things Are promos this past summer.

I prefer to think of Arcade Fire as a mini orchestra rather than a band. They employ a wide array of instruments to give themselves a nicely layered, sensational sound. The way they use several voices often makes them sound more like a church choir than an indie rock band. Their music is more inspirational and theatrical than most. I read something a while ago that compared Funeral to Ok Computer, claiming that both were a perfect embodiment of their creator's sound. That's a pretty bold comparison. I don't know that I would go that far, but I do know I thoroughly enjoy this album. It will lift you up and ground you all in one fell swoop.




11. Kanye West - 808s & Heartbreaks (2008)

Seriously, how many rappers do you know that could pull this off? And how many of those produce the tracks themselves? West made the transition from rap artist to pop singer with such ease but, he's not just passing for a pop singer, he's actually quite good at it. I'm not saying the man has a good voice, in fact, he doesn't and he knows it. That's why he was wise enough to mask himself in an auto-tuner. Some may say that listening to an entire album of such vocal effects is too much, but in my opinion West uses just the right mix of digital sounds, guest rappers and electronica that it only makes sense to use the auto-turner throughout. Anything else would have been a mistake. It would have been embarrassing. The whole point here is that you're not supposed to take his skills as a singer seriously. You're supposed to feel the depression, the grief, the loneliness, the regret and the anger. West's voice is then less the center piece and more a compliment to the music.

In addition to the stylistic departure, the significance of this album is the heart-on-sleeve honesty with which West performs. I'm not sure I've heard a more personal album. I'm not sure how you listen to "Welcome to Heartbreak" and not want to be this guy's friend. He manages to confess his sadness, mourn his losses and face his own weaknesses and still make music you can move to. It sounds like the confessions of depressed robot. It feels like the soundtrack for an animated version of A.I. You can't help but feel empathy for him. You almost cringe at his life as an open book. I read a review of this album right after it was released that described 808s as a very personal album that most artists would not have had the courage to make public. And there we find the uniqueness of Kanye West. Crushing self-consciousness and an ego through the roof.